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Dear Sir,

We wish to stop at your hotel, we will book in for a week,

If you can only grant me, the permission that I seek

To allow my dog to stay with me, each evening, in my room.

Though I realise I'm biased, he is well behaved and groomed.

He's the only family I have left, we're sad if we're alone.

We have planned to leave the thirteenth, can you let me know by phone?

He rang back, and said,

"Mate, I've run pubs for many years, and I cannot recall

One dog stealing sheets or towels or pictures off the wall.

And I've never had to bounce one in the middle of the night,

For being drunk, disorderly and bunging on a fight.

And mate, no dog ever bolted with his hotel bill still due,

So if your furry friend'll vouch for you, why you'll be welcome too."

Larrikin Australian bush/cowboy poet Long John Best is a national champion in his field. Tall Tales is a retrospective of his comic poems with a serious edge and versa visa, serious poems with comic tinges. Included are new works. The old and the new gallop along with breezy rhythms, leaving mirth and nuggets of wisdom in their wake.